Love Plus Four
by Elvyn-Light
Summary: After five years have passed and Hermione and Ron still haven’t realized that they like each other, Harry figures that, with the help of a joke shop and a few drink glasses, he can give them a little push.
1. Just Like Before

**Summary:** After six years have passed and Hermione and Ron still haven't realized that they like each other, Harry realizes that, with the help of a joke shop and a few drink glasses, he can give them a little push.  
**Rating:** PG (may change to PG-13)  
**Disclaimer:** The Harry Potter characters and previous plot belong to J.K. Rowling. I only own the plot.

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**Love Plus Four  
Chapter One : Just Like Before**  
  
Harry sighed as he pulled himself up from the bed, knowing that today was the first day of his sixth year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Turning to open the window, he pulled Hedwig in – she was already sweltering from the early morning heat. (Little Whinging was having a heat wave, which – as stated in the Daily Prophet – was possibly induced by the large number of burnings of Muggle neighborhoods, believed to be caused by You-Know-Who or the mass number of supporters who had popped up when news of his return was widely acknowledged by the Wizarding public.) He stared at his exhausted owl, realizing that she had no less than three letters attached to her leg. He took all three and first opened the one from Hermione. It read:  
_Dear Harry,  
Summer is almost over! Ron seemed depressed about this, but personally, I am not. I can't wait for my N.E.W.T. classes! (Even though I haven't decided what job I'll train for, I'm looking into wizard-Muggle relations, or even a career as an Auror.  
Well, it'll be fun to see you again, and I expect you'll think so too – seeing as you've been stuck with the Dursleys all summer. (They seem quite dreadful – although I expect warnings from the Order could have made them slightly more tolerable.) It's too bad you weren't allowed to leave your house, but perhaps things will be better next year. (Ron refused to come visit without you; he said it would be too odd. Am I really that boring?)  
Well, I'll be seeing you soon!  
Love from  
Hermione  
_Harry sighed, thinking about the end of last year. Something was still tugging at him. _What if he's still there? What if he's just beyond the veil?_ He couldn't bring himself to think about Sirius any longer, so he began to reread the letter.  
  
Hermione seemed to mention Ron whenever a new topic came up. Grinning, he knew that Ron and Hermione were still being oblivious to their feelings for each other. If most everyone knew, then why didn't they acknowledge that they could understand their own actions and realize that they liked each other? If they couldn't comprehend this fact, then everyone would be subject to eternal torture by never-ending fights between two confused teenagers arguing about the many (or, in Hermione's case, few) things they didn't know from their short, affection-deprived lives (as their lack of love was due to the fact that the knowledge of the general Hogwarts public – excluding said two - that they were off-limits, despite the future couple's dis-acknowledgement or un-knowingness – if that was humanly possible – of their hidden undying love for each other).  
  
In Harry's point of view, this was a near-hopeless case.  
  
Anyway, Harry realized that despite any impending problems (such as the fact that he still hadn't read the results of last year's O.W.L. tests), he had, along with anyone else who wanted to permanently retain their sanity (which would otherwise be in jeopardy due to never-ending fights over why the style of Hermione's hair during the second task while she was underwater indicated that she was an undercover spy for Viktor Krum and was continuing to deceive them by informing Krum of the approximate number of twigs in Harry's Firebolt; or how it had taken Ron 3.5 years to realize that Hermione was, indeed, one of the female gender; or what the proper pronunciation of "fellytone" was), to do all in his power to get Ron and Hermione together, whether they liked it (or knew it) or not.  
  
But first he had to read the post.  
  
In letter number two his hopes for a temporary escape from waiting for a year of informing his best friends (one of whom was the smartest witch in their year) that they were perfect for each other and everyone but them knew it so they had better start compromising that the real way to say the name of the Muggle method of long-distance communication was "fellyphone" or they would have a year of food produced by Fred and George to look forward to at breakfast, were crushed when he discovered that it was from a certain redhead 'fellytone'-lobbyer. With a sigh of déjà vu, Harry ripped open the letter, which he read in about 20 seconds –  
_Harry-  
Hermione and I had a row. (She was blathering on about how the TriWizard tournament was supposed to bring the schools together, instead of someone accusing someone else about following the friendly spirit of the contest. I don't have any idea as to what she's talking about.)  
Anyway, see you on the train.  
-Ron_  
Harry just rolled his eyes, knowing that the task would probably be much harder than he imagined.  
  
So much for sanity.  
  
Realizing that there was another letter, he tossed the first two aside and tore open the last. Scanning it, he discovered that its purpose was to inform him that members of the Order were to arrive at his house (Harry checked his watch) . . five minutes ago! Hearing a rather impatient tap at the window (which he assumed was coming from another owl), he hurriedly chucked all three letters into the dustbin. Buckling his trunk, he then inserted Hedwig into her cage and put it and the trunk by his open door. Finally, he put on his jacket and turned to the window to answer the knocking. To his horror, he discovered Dudley at the window (supported by the sloping roof of the first-floor's extension), dressed in nothing other than an apparent wig of Lucius Malfoy's long blond hair and Mrs. Figg's robes, complete with carpet slippers. Eyes widening, he dashed to and threw open the window.  
  
"Dudley?!" he shouted, worried about his cousin's presence at the window along with his newly-found cross-dressing attire.  
  
Luckily (for Harry's respiratory health), he let out a long breath as the platinum-blonde mane retreated rapidly into a pudgy skull, leaving about three inches of spiked bubblegum hair in its place. Meanwhile, it was Dudley's grapefruit diet all over again as the tubby face seemed to be revolted at something placed in front of him – or perhaps he was trying to think. In any case, Harry was relieved as he found that it was Tonks, not a newly-garbed Dudley, approaching him at the moment.  
  
"Tonks!" he cried out in surprise.  
  
"Harry Potter!" she shouted back. "Glad to know you didn't confuse me with your cousin."  
  
He crossed his eyes, replying, "Don't worry – I don't think anyone with the name Nymphadora could be confused with Dudley."  
  
Tonks stuck out her tongue as she climbed through the window. "You never know," she said sarcastically, stumbling over the Muggle newspaper that was scattered about the floor – Harry had been reading it the night before.  
  
"What's this?" she exclaimed, discovering the still picture across the center of the paper, which resembled an American baseball player, seemingly about to hit the ball. "Why isn't he on a broom?" she asked, before rambling, "And shouldn't that bat be wider? And the bludger bigger? And why – isn't – he – moving?!"  
  
Harry stared at her, afraid of her next move. Not about to explain the concept of "baseball" (which would likely be met with frustrated cries of, "Why don't they just summon the ball into their mitts?"), he shrugged.  
  
"Un-evolved form of Quidditch," he replied simply, before closing and locking the window and exiting the room, lugging the trunk downstairs. He faintly heard her reply.  
  
"Wow, Muggles are so far behind us... I obviously have no tolerance for the lack of their intelligence in our world. You would think that they would at least have the decency to allow their pictures to move – it must be tough staying still all the time! Well, I guess I can't blame them for not being magical, but... Ergh, I always knew Muggle Studies was a boring and pointless class." Apparently realizing that Harry was gone, she, too, left the room, taking his owl with her., "C'mon, wighead – ouch! What was that for?! Bloody owl, the Muggles must be letting their stupidity rub off on her. Can't even recognize her own name!"  
  
Harry grinned, seeing Remus' face through the window of the door. Assuring Lupin that the Dursleys were at a story convention ("It's where they write about pixies and magic and that stuff – they think it's all fiction, though."), he quickly wrote a note that consisted of, "Gone to school, be back next summer. –Harry", he allowed the (former) professor in. Lupin was carrying a ticket stub, labeled Platform Nine-and-Three-quarters. Meanwhile, Tongs levitated the birdcage downstairs. Harry took it as Lupin handed her the ticket and lugged Harry's trunk to them. With a firm grip on Hedwig's cage with his left hand, Harry reached out and took hold of the ticket as Lupin did the same. As the clock struck eleven, the three of them were instantly transported to the hallway of the Hogwarts Express.  
  
"Morphkey," Lupin explained quickly. "It changes as does its preset destination."  
  
Hearing footsteps, Harry released the ticket, which had now become a letter addressed to Number Twelve Grimmauld Place. Taking his trunk, he stared at the two. "See you," he said dully.  
  
Tonks waved apologetically with her free hand as the two disappeared at 11:01. Shuffling his belongings around, he realized that the footsteps were accompanied by voices – arguing voices.  
  
"Harry won't have missed the train!"  
  
"But what if something happened?"  
  
"What if something hasn't? What if he's waiting for us right – " Harry watched as Ron and Hermione turned the corner, "– here."  
  
Hermione gaped at him before tackling Harry in a hug. "I was worried! Thought you had missed the train!" She rambled on until the train gave a funny jolt.  
  
"Let's get inside a compartment, and then you can explain how you can worry about Harry while eating Bertie Bott's Every-Flavor Beans and talk on the fellytone at the same time."  
  
Hermione glared at him. "I've been telling you for three years, Ronald – it's 'telephone'!"  
  
As Harry stepped into the corridor, he knew that simply getting them to agree on a word might be as far as he ever got.

**

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Author's Note: **My first FanFiction! =) And it's a Hermione/Ron. =/ Anyway, please review! (Second chapter is on the way!) 


	2. Welcome Back

**Summary:** After six years have passed and Hermione and Ron still haven't realized that they like each other, Harry realizes that, with the help of a joke shop and a few drink glasses, he can give them a little push.  
**Rating:** PG (may change to PG-13)  
**Disclaimer:** The Harry Potter characters and previous plot belong to J.K. Rowling. I only own the plot.

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**Love Plus Four  
Chapter Two : Welcome Back**  
  
Ron resorted to staring out the window throughout the train ride. Hermione and Harry were talking about new teachers (and, in effect, new classes) for their sixth year. He was half-content with staring out the window, until a rather large and surly owl came to flap next to their compartment, obviously wanting to be let in. Staring at it, he took to associating it with an older Bulgarian. Therefore, it was only natural for him to avoid any signs of having noticed its presence there, as he stared off into the empty seat next to Hermione, which was across from him. He grinned, feeling that if he could just keep Krum from talking to Hermione, then that would be the end of that. It was only when the large bird began squawking to get the attention of the occupants did Ron frown and jump animatedly into the conversation.  
  
"Wouldn't it be odd if Umbridge was back this year?" he interrupted.  
  
Hermione glared at him. "We were talking about becoming Aurors, Ron. Have you been listening?"  
  
He was spared an answer by the awkward silence that followed – and the imposter owl wailed (if that was possible for a two-foot-wide bird).  
  
Hermione started harder before switching her horrified gaze to the window. "Ronald Weas–" But her cry was interrupted as the Bulgarian owl shrieked and fell out of sight.  
  
"What the -?!" Ron cried, hoping that any and all events related to the owl's disappearance would not be blamed on him. He opened the window, and the trio stuck their heads out.  
  
Harry searched for any signs of the owl, trying to figure out where it had gone.  
  
Hermione began crying softly, which lasted about five seconds – at which time the tears were replaced by a blazing red color arriving upon her cheeks. "Ron.. if – you –had – just – open–"  
  
Luckily (for Ron, at least), the surly owl reappeared, flying back to the window.  
  
"See, he's alright," Harry protested, trying to stop the argument before it got to throwing books and chess sets at their respective owners.  
  
Ron shrugged, knowing he had to get the blame off himself. "But what was that all about? Why'd he vanish?"  
  
Ron's query was answered as a large owl of approximately the same size (perhaps even bigger) swooped down upon the grey one and tore at its legs, presumably trying to steal, or at least mangle, the arriving letter. This, he would not have minded, except it was causing Hermione great distress. So as Harry looked to the right and Ron to the left, he discovered the cause of the fight. (Many people along the train had gathered at their windows to observe.)  
  
"Malfoy," he spat, still watching the fight with hate-filled interest. Ron found himself admitting that Krum's owl was actually rather smart. But intelligence didn't mean speed; a certain blonde-haired menace had the faster bird.  
  
Suddenly, he realized that Hermione was gripping his right hand so hard it was going numb.  
  
But just as Ron had unlocked Pigwidgeon's cage (who was now squealing madly and throwing himself across the cage) in an attempt to create a distraction, the grey owl took a great dive down towards the lake surface. Hermione gave a shriek, seeing as the golden bird (Malfoy's) was still trailing it. But all those years of devotion to Quidditch had paid off : Ron recognized this move as the Wronski Feint, a move that (he scowled) the owl's owner had pulled off two short years ago. He watched as the grey owl skimmed the surface of the lake, but Malfoy's, going too fast, plunged into the water and resurfaced a few seconds later. Krum's owl returned to the window, exhausted. Hermione allowed him to perch on her arm, while Pig, obviously jealous of the foreign owl's attention, began zooming around the compartment in an apparent attempt to gather some of his own. This ended when he flew straight into Krum's owl and, after a muffled screech, emerged, covered in grey feathers, and dropped onto the floor in a mock faint.  
  
Ron seized this opportunity to shove Pig back in his cage and inform Hermione of the murderous intentions of the strange owl.  
  
"It almost killed Pig!" he exclaimed. "It's smirking, I swear! Homicidal bird!"  
  
The trio turned to stare at the grey owl, who returned their gaze by watching them with such a blank look on its face that it reminded Ron (again) strikingly of a certain Bulgarian.  
  
Hermione opened her moth the retort, but before she could do so, they watched the door of the compartment open to reveal a furious Draco Malfoy, flanked by cronies Crabbe and Goyle, both of which were supporting a sopping-wet bird.  
  
"Look what you've done!" exclaimed Malfoy.  
  
Ron saw that Hermione was pointedly staring out the window. _She probably thinks she's going to get in trouble._ "It wasn't us who sent your owl after that one," he remarked.  
  
Malfoy's face grew redder. "This isn't just an owl, Weasley. It's half-Augurey, which means it's nearly half-Phoenix. In any case, your family couldn't afford one if they sold their house. When my father –"  
  
At this point, Hermione used her free arm to hold back Ron's. "Don't, Ron! He's just doing that to set you off."  
  
Malfoy's growing smirk disappeared after Harry replied coolly, "'My father- ' what, Malfoy? Is he planning to break out of Azkaban? I'll be sure to inform the guards, if that's the case. Anyway," he began closing the compartment door slowly, "I don't think we have a reason to be afraid of you running to your daddy dearest." At this, he shut the door in Malfoy's face.  
  
Hermione sighed and shook her head, releasing Ron's arm. Staring out the window absentmindedly, she stated, "You'd think they would have something better to do than annoy us."  
  
Ron stared at the owl, determined to know its origin. "Er, so –" he began, trying to develop a plan to get rid of Krum's owl, "– where'd this owl come from?"  
  
Hermione looked up, and saw that Ron was watching Pig (who was sleeping) with forced interest. "Well," she said, beaming, "Viktor purchased Merle over the summer so we could owl each other – I don't have one, you know," she finished carefully, avoiding his eyes.  
  
Ron gaped. "Oh, so Vicky is spending his hard-earned money on Harry's best friend. What a surprise."  
  
Hermione stared at Ron in disbelief. "I can't believe you haven't gotten over the fact that I'm his friend!"  
  
"I'm telling you, Hermione – it's a bribe!" he shouted back.  
  
"Honestly, Ron! Is there something wrong with talking to him? You don't get mad when I talk to Harry!"  
  
Ron glared back, although something inside hurt – she was really half-wrong. He had felt a pang of jealousy when she had hugged Harry – she had merely waved to him when they met and was instantly caught up in a heated conversation with Ginny about new dress robes. "Why should I have a problem with Harry? He's our friend! Krum's an outsider!"  
  
Harry merely watched all of this from his spot in the corner with suppressed interest, hoping he wouldn't have to interfere.  
  
Hermione stared at him, before jumping up and poking him in the chest. "If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were jealous!"  
  
At this, Ron's ears turned a bright red as he sputtered, "Jealous? Of that – oaf? Ha! You're supposed to be the brightest witch in our year, so why don't you act like it?"  
  
Hermione glared at him. "You're supposed to be sixteen, Ron – act like it!" With a huff she extended her arm to Merle, and Crookshanks began to follow her out. As she opened the door, she said, "Seeing as I'm a prefect, I'm going to go to the meeting. Because neither of you sent me very informative letters," she stared at each of them icily, "I assume that I'll be having a grand time with Malfoy." With that, she walked through the doorway and slammed it behind her. Walking down the corridor, she muttered indistinguishable curses.  
  
Ron seemed upset. "Why should I be jealous of that Bulgarian? He can't even say her name!" He fell into a momentary deep silence. "Wait – did she say 'prefect meeting'?"  
  
Harry nodded slowly; despite the fact that he had taken to tuning out of the conversation, he knew that listening to the argument could be a future way of getting the two together.  
  
Ron paled. "That's just another thing for her to yell at me for!" he said glumly. Picking up Pig's cage, he waved sadly. "Make sure you're not 'causing trouble' – I have 'prefect duty'. Ergh – maybe I'll get to dock a few points from Crabbe and Goyle." Yet he still didn't perk up. "Save us a carriage, will you?" Reopening the door, he exited and closed it, trudging down the hallway in the direction Hermione had gone.  
  
As Ron carried Pigwidgeon's cage down the hall, he felt a surge of hate for a certain Bulgarian Quidditch player – and judging by how Pig kept throwing himself against the birdcage in the direction Hermione had gone, he thought his owl felt the same way, too.

**

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Author's Note: **Second chapter, yay! =) Please review; it'll give me incentive to write the third chapter!


	3. News of a Return

**Summary:** After six years have passed and Hermione and Ron still haven't realized that they like each other, Harry figures that, with the help of a joke shop and a few drink glasses, he can give them a little push.  
**Rating:** PG (may change to PG-13)  
**Disclaimer:** The Harry Potter characters and previous plot belong to J.K. Rowling. I only own the plot.

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**Love Plus Four  
Chapter Three : News of a Return**  
  
Hermione stormed down the corridor. _Who does he think he is, telling me I can't talk to Viktor? He talks to Luna, and –_ She put her hand over her mouth as if she had said the last part aloud. Resuming her walk, she bickered with herself. _I'm not jealous of Luna . . and so that would mean Ron isn't jealous of Viktor. It's settled._ Putting on a false cheery smile as if to convince herself that the matter was over and done with (and she would not continue it again – ha! The only reasonable time that Hermione would drop an argument was when Voldemort decided to hand out flowers.) and discovered that she was at the door to the room for the sixth years' prefect meeting. With a sigh, she stared at the door, seeing that there was a figure on the other side, who most likely had detected her arrival. Sure enough, Draco Malfoy was at the door. It was only then that she realized by looking through the window that everyone else was there, and (she checked her watch) she was five minutes tardy.  
  
This fact was confirmed when Malfoy stared at her, drawling, "You're late," and a voice everyone here, but then muttered, "Not so perfect after all, Mudblood?"  
  
Hermione stared at him icily before replying in a whisper, "But at least I've never been turned into a ferret – you really would think you could be in control of your species by now, Malfoy." Turning to the room, she said civilly, "Yes – but now that you're not moving aside, I assume I am becoming even tardier?"  
  
Smirking rather uncharacteristically, she stepped by him and took a seat on the bright-red Gryffindor couch. Settling in, she saw that everyone was still staring at her. Suddenly, she realized that all the prefects were the same as last year; which meant that Ron was one as well. About five seconds later, right as she was about to ask what was the matter; Ron came bursting into the room.  
  
"Sorry I'm late," he said breathlessly, going to sit down on the sofa next to Hermione (but not looking in her eyes at all).  
  
Setting Pig's cage on the floor, he, too, took to staring at the windows (front) of the room in a wait for the Head Boy and Girl to arrive.  
  
"Hello, I'm Cho Chang, Head Girl. This," she motioned haphazardly to the disinterested boy next to her, "is Roger Davies, Head Boy."  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes. _How did she get to be Head Girl? She's not near- perfect. And I thought Davies was older – oh, maybe he got held back. He wasn't looking too bright at the Yule Ball back in fourth year, either._  
  
Seeing as she was losing interest with her audience, Cho said shyly, "Er – now, you are to begin patrolling the corridors of the train. If you find anything – " she made a flustered motion with her hands, "– then come get Davies or me, okay?" But as the occupants began to gather their belongings, Cho added, "Oh – and all restrictions that were placed under Umbridge's headship are now invalid." She checked her piece of paper. "Divination may be taught by two teachers – Firenze, and Professor Trelawney – it is undecided as of yet. Professor McGonagall will continue teaching Transfiguration, as will Hagrid with Care of Magical Creatures."  
  
Hermione and Ron grinned triumphantly. I knew Hagrid would come back. However, Hermione had lost interest in Cho's speech and was not opening the letter from Viktor.  
  
"However, I am pleased to announce that we have a new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher." Cho paused, beaming. "And he –"  
  
Hermione finished reading the letter at this moment, and as she rescanned it (as if she was in shock), her jaw dropped. "Merlin.."  
  
It was then when Cho announced that Viktor Krum was the new D.A.D.A. teacher that several things happened.  
  
Krum walked into the room, slightly tanner, more muscular, and, well, manlier than he was remembered.  
  
Merle took off at full speed, jetting towards his owner as if it was a matter of life or death, causing Pigwidgeon to flutter about madly in his cage.  
  
Hannah Abbott and Padma Patil rushed up to Krum, attempting to compliment him in the most absurd ways, despite his repeated attempts to get across the room.  
  
Pansy stared ruefully at Krum, apparently trying to imagine what Malfoy would look like if he was more like that.  
  
Crookshanks hissed and dashed out of the room.  
  
Hermione stared blankly at Viktor before sprinting out of the room empty- handed.  
  
Ron gaped at Krum for what seemed like an eternity before getting up and following Hermione's path outside the large compartment. He saw bushy hair going into another room as he returned to the one they had shared before – but this time, he had Krum's letter; he was determined to ask Harry if all this had anything to do with him.  
  
But as Hermione stepped into Ginny's compartment and watched as she ushered her friends out, she wasn't thinking about the letter, but about Viktor himself. _How could he just show up here?_ Her thoughts rambled. _Why couldn't he have told me before?_ As she clutched her head, another Weasley wondered what was wrong.  
  
"Hermione –" she said quietly.  
  
Hermione pulled her head out of her hands, not to reveal a tear stricken teenager but a furious Gryffindor. "He's here," she said simply.  
  
"Come again?" asked a puzzled Ginny; her friend had entered nearly in sobs, but now she seemed enraged.  
  
Hermione remembered then that it was a violation of the rules to reveal prefect business to other students. Figuring that even to reveal the identity of a new teacher before everyone else was informed would probably not be a good idea. As if searching for words, she said, "Umbridge will not be returning – and you'll find out the rest in the Great Hall." Excusing herself rather abruptly she left to go to the girl's bathroom to change into her robes.  
  
While in the lavatory, Hermione heard three other girls enter. After they began talking, she realized that they were her fellow prefects, discussing the physical aspects of 'Professor Krum'. Hermione stood silent while listening.  
  
"Did you see him?"  
  
"And he plays Quidditch too!"  
  
"He looks really nice – if only he had Draco's face and money."  
  
There was a disgusted silence as the effects of Pansy's statement reverberated throughout the room.  
  
"Whatever, Parkinson."  
  
"You deserve him."  
  
Suddenly, the mood became hushed as they came to a new (yet still Viktor- related) topic.  
  
"Hermione Granger went to the ball with him, back in fourth year," said Parkinson.  
  
"Oh, I know. Don't remind me."  
  
"A little jealous now, aren't we?" stated Hannah. "Your sister went with a Champion, too."  
  
"And I went with Ron Weasley," said Padma sulkily. "He was staring at her the whole time."  
  
Assorted gasps came from the other two.  
  
"I wouldn't have minded taking Hermione's place – I mean, it's sort-of obvious they like each other, isn't it?"  
  
There were muttered agreements, before they found a new way to claim the Bulgarian. After a swish of robes, Hermione assumed they had exited the bathroom. But at this point, she was not fixated on Viktor's "Quidditch- sculpted body" – in fact, she was concerned about Ron and the 'state of affairs' between them, so to speak._ Is it really that obvious? How could I be the last to know?_ She gave herself a mental slap. _Stop being such a gossip hound. Plus, we don't even like each other – why can't they see that? We're always fighting!_ Pulling herself out of her own mental argument, she unlocked the stall and returned to the corridor. She glared in the general direction of the other prefects before returning to Harry and Ron's compartment. Remembering that she had forgotten to patrol the corridors, she vowed to make up for it when she was observing the dungeons. As she slid open the door, she was relieved to see that Ron had also 'forgotten' his duties. But she was curious as their conversation ended as she entered the room.  
  
"Hey," waved Harry, inviting her to sit next to him.  
  
"Hullo," said Ron weakly, avoiding her gaze.  
  
Trying to refrain from asking (or answering) any questions, she said, "I suppose we'll be arriving soon.." Filled with both anticipation and dread, Hermione watched as the scenery outside the window came to a halt.  
  
"I guess so," said Harry, grinning.  
  
Hermione discovered Crookshanks on the overhead rack. Harry quieted her qualms as he assured her that had to have gotten himself up there somehow – at which Ron mentioned that her cat was getting weirder by the year. Still suspicious, Hermione motioned for the first two to follow her off of the train. She flagged down a 'horseless' carriage (those things still made them uneasy) for the three of them, and then hopped in. Yet the ride up to the castle was unusually silent as the rain began pitter-pattering on the roof of the carriage. But the trio was put back into their normal routine as Hermione cast a water-repelling charm on the three of them. So it was as they made their way up to the front hall completely dry (as opposed to sopping wet like the rest) that they had high spirits. Unfortunately, these were dampened as Hermione scanned the staff table and immediately stiffened.  
  
Taking their seats at the Gryffindor table, Ron made sure to seat himself opposite Hermione, between Harry and Neville. As they listened to the Sorting, Hermione stared distantly into the bewitched ceiling overhead. As Ron stared at it, he realized that the tiny moving objects were not shooting stars, but miniature professional Quidditch players. Hermione seemed determined to pick out a certain one of them. It seemed doubtful that she would ever relent from this task, until Fred and George took seats next to Hermione and Ginny. Hermione's jaw dropped.  
  
"What – you guys – I thought you started your business!" she exclaimed.  
  
"We did," confirmed Fred.  
  
"But because we didn't exactly graduate –" began George.  
  
"-we thought it might be a good idea to stay for half of this year, to 'complete' our seventh year, so to speak."  
  
"And market a few test products, if we can."  
  
Hermione glared at the two sternly. "I'm prefect, you know," she aid, "So one wrong move and –"  
  
Fred and George made cutting motions across their necks.  
  
"We know," said Fred, "We won't misbehave."  
  
"If we do," added George, "ickle Ronnikins will tell on us. And we wouldn't want that."  
  
As Hermione sighed in defeat and began staring at her empty plate, Dumbledore clapped his hands, silencing the students. "It is my pleasure to announce that our new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher is none other than Bulgarian's own Seeker, Viktor Krum!"  
  
At this, there were many hushed whispers and looks directed to Hermione before the hall erupted in clapping.  
  
Hermione continued staring at her plate.  
  
After a few moments of talking on Dumbledore's part, the tables were filled with food. Hermione did not take any, but simply resumed staring at the ceiling in disgust. The new topic among the Gryffindors was how and why they had a professional Quidditch player to help them learn to protect themselves from evil.  
  
It was somewhere in the middle of this that Ron claimed he had Krum's signature.  
  
Hermione looked up, turning to Ron darkly. "You –" she began menacingly, apparently remembering that she had forgotten her letter back at the prefect's meeting. "You have my letter – obviously, the signature –" Her face continued growing redder by the second.  
  
Ron became flustered, lying through his teeth. "Er – signature is from the end of fourth year – don't you remember?"  
  
Hermione stood up. "What is it with you and blaming things on other people?" she said accusingly. "It's my letter – and if you have a problem with him writing to me, don't just steal my messages!" Stepping out of the bench, she walked five feet, and as she opened her mouth to say something, she gained a shocked look on her face. After that, all she managed to say was, "Not everything is about you!" She then stormed out of the Great Hall.  
  
Ron gaped after her, even as the rest of the Hall began to empty out. "She – she knows everything!" It was then that Ron turned around and saw Krum himself, staring after Hermione.  
  
"Vell, I suppose this vouldn't be a good time to say hullo," he said gloomily, retreating back up to the staff table.  
  
Harry and Ginny promptly pointed at the door, a sign, Ron realized, to follow Hermione. Pushing aside the other students, he found Hermione standing across from Malfoy.  
  
"Upset that both your little boyfriends have dumped you?" he snarled. "Get your life in check, filthy Mudblood."  
  
And with that, Ron watched as Hermione closed the distance between herself and Draco, and raised her arm. There was a large smack as Hermione's hand connected with Malfoy's cheek.  
  
"Check that, Malfoy," she spat, leaving two stunned boys in her wake.  
  
Ron began chasing after her, but it was only after he arrived at the portrait hole that he realized that he did not have the password.  
  
Meanwhile, Hermione lugged her suitcase and bookbag up the stairs into the Girls' Dormitories and threw herself on her bed.  
  
_ I was looking forward to coming back . . . but it's not like returning to the same place if everything has changed._

* * *

**Author's Note: **Yay! Reviews! eats the reviews =D Reviews make me keep writing, so . . the fourth chapter will be up when I can post it, but . . keep 'em coming!

[A note to:  
katie - you really should write your own story! But don't worry, Fred and George play a great, huge, humongous part in this story. They're two of the four in "Love Plus Four". . . and I hope that the Hermione - Draco interaction in this chapter was good enough!]


	4. An Unveiled Plan

**Summary:** After six years have passed and Hermione and Ron still haven't realized that they like each other, Harry figures that, with the help of a joke shop and a few drink glasses, he can give them a little push.  
**Rating:** PG (may change to PG-13)  
**Disclaimer:** The Harry Potter characters and previous plot belong to J.K. Rowling. I only own the plot.

* * *

**Love Plus Four  
Chapter Four : An Unveiled Plan**

Harry remained at the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall. He was thinking about the same thing he had been that very same morning: how to get Ron and Hermione together. His face in his hands, he muttered a few words aloud.

"If everyone else knows they like each other, why don't they?"

Ginny turned to Harry with an expression of irritated boredom across her face. "You wouldn't be talking about Hermione and Ron, would you?" she asked.

Rather surprised that she knew what he was thinking, Harry nodded slowly.

Ginny sighed darkly. "It's awful, isn't it? If we could only get them to realize it..." A malicious grin burst across her face. "That's it! If we could just get them to figure it out..."

"...without them knowing that we were helping them," he continued.

Ginny's face lit up. "Sort of like..."

"...a bad joke," Harry finished.

After a furious blush on Ginny's part, they grinned. "So – " she began, but was cut off by her twin brothers.

"Did I just hear – " Fred started.

" – someone say 'joke'?" added George.

"Er – " Ginny said, but Harry cut her off to explain their predicament.

"Sounds tough," said Fred dramatically.

"But as our motto says..." began George.

" 'There's nothing a good joke can't solve,' " said the two in unison.

"But how can jokes get them to – " said Ginny, unconvinced.

"Don't worry, Harry – " said George icily.

"All those who invest – " Fred winked, "– in Weasley's Wizard Wheezes shall be rewarded."

Ginny realized that she was being ignored, and with a pained look toward Harry, stormed out of the hall.

"I think Ginny wanted to help," said Harry, slightly scared of the consequences of an angry Ginny Weasley.

"Oh? Well, she wasn't concerned for us when we asked about Angelina and Alicia last week."

"She was going to visit their shop – it's right next door – and when we asked how they were, she just giggled."

"So we figure that – "

" – she doesn't deserve it."

"Anyway," concluded Fred, "we'll be seeing you around, Harry."

"Stay tuned for future developments."

Harry watched the twins exit the Great Hall, and then began to walk to the common room as well. Next to the portrait hole, he found a miserable Ron and a desperate Neville - both of whom seemed not to know the password.

"Mimbulus Mimbletonia," Harry said dully, proceeding inside the now-open portrait hole.

Ron faced him with a query as soon as they settled down into the fluffy red chairs. "What did I do wrong?"

Harry tried to swallow his sarcasm and said instead, "I think the real question is, what _didn't _you do wrong?"

Ron moaned and stuffed a pillow in his face. After a few moments' silence, he sighed weakly. "Well, maybe she'll forget it by tomorrow," he finished lamely. "'Night, Harry."

Harry watched his friend stumble into the dormitories. After awhile, he saw Ginny enter (she was conveniently avoiding his stare). She seemed engrossed in a letter. After a few minutes, he heard a squeal, then a rushed storming up the stairs. Puzzled, Harry retired to the boys' dorm. _Maybe it **will **go away overnight._

Alas, how wrong he was.

The next morning, Harry proceeded to the Great Hall for breakfast. Ron was sitting across the table from a still-bitter Hermione. Harry took a seat next to Ron, while Ginny sat next to Hermione when she arrived moments later. Soon after, the post arrived. Ron became preoccupied with Pig )as he kept trying to attack the bird at the teachers' table). Hermione was scanning the _Daily Prophet_. It was at this moment that several things happened.

The food and drink appeared on the table. Suddenly, Harry watched as Ginny replaced Ron's and Hermione's respective cups with identical ones ... yet the new drink glasses had more of a mirror-like quality to them. Ginny grinned mischievously, performing a vanishing spell on the stolen goblets.

Harry looked at her questionably, but then realized that the current scheme probably had to do with the plan of the night before ... Therefore, he pretended to act inconspicuously, taking a bit out of a piece of toast.

Shortly after, Ron threw Pig into the air, apparently not quite interested in what his owl could do to Merle. He began pouring himself a glass of apple cider. Ginny seemed to be bursting with the burden of the "secret of the drink glasses". Harry watched as Ron set down the jug, and turned back to his goblet.

Reaching for his cup, Ron brought it up to his mouth to take a sip. It was about halfway through a gulp when he opened his eyes, seeing the reflection on the mirrorlike glass. He suddenly turned white as a sheet, dropping the goblet and allowing it to shatter on the table as he sprayed cider all over Hermione's paper. Then came the "secret of the drink glasses".

Ron screamed in an uncharacteristically high-pitched voice, "Bloody hell! I've been turned into a girl!"

* * *

**Author's Note: **Finally, another chapter up... Finally... -smacks self on head 1,000 times- I know, I know, I know - this definately should have been up earlier. I tried to upload it about a week ago, but my computer totally died. Bleargh. I promise to have once-a-week updates from now on! -cringes- I've been writing these out in longhand before uploading them.. Makes my hands sore, and it's after a long day of school as well. Heh. In the words of George, "Stay tuned for future updates!" 

In Addition : I apologize for the lack of indentations into the paragraphs; it won't put them in... :(


	5. Owls and Dreams

**Summary:** After five years have passed and Hermione and Ron still haven't realized that they like each other, Harry figures that, with the help of a joke shop and a few drink glasses, he can give them a little push.  
**Rating:** K+  
**Disclaimer:** The Harry Potter characters and previous plot belong to J.K. Rowling. I only own the plot of this fanfiction.

**

* * *

Love Plus Four  
Chapter Five : Owls and Dreams**

"_Bloody hell! I've been turned into a girl!"_

The whole Gryffindor table turned to look at Ron.

"You're not a girl," Neville offered.

Harry turned to Ginny, who was staring at Ron intently. "What's going on?" he mouthed, but the youngest Weasley just shook her head furiously and maintained her stare.

"But – but -" Ron stuttered, "My reflection! I looked like a girl!"

Ginny grinned. "Who, exactly, did you see?"

He looked at his sister. "Well, Hermione, but -"

Ginny squealed. "I knew it!" she shouted triumphantly, before gathering her books and dashing off in the direction of the dormitories.

" – but that's not possible," Ron finished, staring after Ginny's retreating form. "What a load of rubbish," he said, looking at the fragments of his drink glass. "Whatever it is she's talking about."

Hermione stared at the boys before stuffing her glass in her bookbag. She seemed irritated about how a certain redhead had spilled apple juice all over her _Daily Prophet_. "I'm going to do some research," she announced.

"On what?" Ron asked, but she was already gone.

At that same moment, Fred and George took their respective seats at the table. "We saw Ginny leave," Fred said. "What happened?"

"I need to talk to you guys," Harry muttered. "It's about the…situation."

George's eyes lit up an almost malicious manner. "We'll have no problem cheering up our little brother. All these arguments with Hermione definitely aren't good for him."

The three turned to look at Ron, who had continued to munch on his toast among his shattered goblet and Hermione's apple-juice-stained newspaper.

"Even if it does take a joke or two," Fred finished.

"Meet me at 7:00 in the owlery," Harry said, getting up to go to class. "C'mon, Ron, we've got Potions."

"Mrph…kay," the red-haired boy said, stuffing the rest of his toast into his mouth as he got his books and followed Harry out of the Great Hall.

Throughout Snape's class, Harry was trying to figure out how Fred and George would be able to help get Ron and Hermione together. Love potions were out of the question, considering that Hermione had already been accused of using one during fourth year. After Snape deducted ten points from Gryffindor, Harry resolved to temporarily forget about setting up the two friends and start working on winning the House Cup.

The day passed uneventfully. Hermione seemed preoccupied with something else, while Ron was still uneasy about the whole identity crisis earlier in the day. Harry made a mental note to ask Ginny what that had been all about.

After dinner, he hurried up to the owlery. Fred and George were already waiting.

"So, Harry, what've you got in mind?" Fred inquired.

Harry explained the Hermione/Ron problem. There was a few moments of silence afterwards, in which Harry noticed, much to his dismay, that an owl had utilized his shoulder for a bathroom.

Suddenly George had an idea. "Aha!" he shouted, pulling several items out of the innermost pockets of his robes.

"Test products," Fred said, seeing Harry's slack-jawed gaze. "With the help of the Shrink 'n Bring, we can fit most of our experiments on our persons."

George finally found the object which held his interest. "Here it is," he declared, holding up a vial, "the object that will make your dreams come true – or, rather, make you act on them."

"What does it do?" Harry asked in amazement.

Fred took the vial from his twin. "This little drink reveals to the consumer their most-treasured thing, be it person, passion, or … thing. Whatever they feel strongly about will appear in their dreams the night after they take a sip of this little drink."

Harry looked at the two, confused. "But how will this help?"

George grinned. "It does more than just that, Harry. The day after, the consumer will feel inclined to go share whatever it is they're thinking about."

Harry nodded. "I get it. That should work." He then paused for a moment. "There's something I don't understand, though: how would you use this in a joke shop?"

Fred replied, "Well, it might be interesting (even funny) to see how people react to it. Malfoy, for instance."

Harry pictured Malfoy running around with a bottle of Sleekeasy's hair gel, professing his love for the hair product. "Oh, well then…"

"Right!" Fred nodded, handing his vial to the black-haired boy as George produced one just like it.

"You should take these, too," George added, handing over two mugs of butterbeer. "They have a containment spell on them which should wear off soon."

Harry realized that the mugs were for putting the vials of liquid in. As he turned to leave, he asked, "What do you call this, anyway?"

The twins looked at each other before answering simultaneously, "Spoiled Secrets!"

Harry nodded slowly before heading back to Gryffindor Tower.

"Ah, the young and in love," Fred said wistfully.

"Maybe we should give some of this to Angelina and Alicia," George motioned.

"A right idea indeed," Fred replied before the two disappeared to some further mischief.

Back in the common room, Harry found his two companions sitting in chairs facing each other by the fire. _They're not fighting, but they're not exactly deep in conversation, either._

"Hi guys," Harry said.

Hermione nodded as she continued to scribble madly.

Ron stated weakly, "Hullo."

Harry uncorked each vial on a separate table and poured each of them into their own mug. "I got something for you guys," he announced, revealing the butterbeer. "A sort-of 'congratulations' for surviving the first day of term."

Hermione looked relieve, taking the mug and drinking half of it without even questioning its origin. "Thanks, Harry," she said. "Rough first day."

Ron nodded as if to say "ditto" before drinking up.

Harry grinned absentmindedly. A few minutes passed after the two had finished their butterbeer with Hermione writing, Harry thinking, and Ron just staring off into space before anything changed. Finally, Ron snapped out of his stupor.

"I'm going to bed," he said. "'Night, Harry. 'Night, Hermione."

Hermione nodded as the Boy who Lived replied, "See you tomorrow." Ron disappeared up the stairs. About an hour passed before Hermione finally got out of her chair to stretch.

"Well, Harry, I'm going to bed. You should be getting to sleep too," she warned.

"I'll be fine. Sweet dreams," he replied. Hermione gave him an odd look before proceeding to the girls' dormitories. Harry sat idle for a few minutes before realizing that he had Potions homework to do.

"Dang Snape," he muttered before pulling a roll of parchment and quill out of his bag. "And to top it all off, all I can think about are love potions…"

Meanwhile, Ron was sleeping restlessly. "'Mione…"

**

* * *

Author's Note: . . . . . .wow. I haven't updated this since, what, October of 2004? I am…ashamed. Ugh. Oh well; it's summer 2005 now, and I shall have much time to finish this! I think about two chapters are left in it, because I have it all planned out. I've set a deadline for myself: July 15. That is, of course, the day before the sixth book come out, and reading that would throw off the interpretation of this story. I'm thinking another chapter should be out next week. Thank you so much for reading this, and please review!**


	6. Product S001

**Summary:** After five years have passed and Hermione and Ron still haven't realized that they like each other, Harry figures that, with the help of a joke shop and a few drink glasses, he can give them a little push.  
**Rating:** K+  
**Disclaimer:** The Harry Potter characters and previous plot belong to J.K. Rowling. I only own the plot of this fanfiction.

* * *

**Love Plus Four  
ChapterSix : Product S001**

Hermione was not sleeping, but she was as restless as Ron. She slowly pulled everything out of her bookbag, including the drink glass from breakfast. Staring at the goblet, Hermione gave it an intimidating glare before resigning herself to her fate.

"Ugh," she said aloud, frustrated that the image of a certain redhead remained prominently displayed across the goblet. She turned to one of the books she had taken from the school library, titledMagic Mirror.Page 1 read:

_"The Mirror of Erised shows the viewer their innermost desire. However, this is not always attainable. It is in cases such as these that the mirror poses a danger. Many a case of devastation has been chronicled when the user found that their most-desired thing could not be acquired. The viewer must be able to accept the truth..."_

Hermione slammed the book shut. _I knew it,_ she thought proudly. _Harry was telling us about it during First Year.._ Frustrated with her results, she turned to the cause of the situation, as opposed to her 'undesirable' conclusion (the fact that Ron was her most-treasured thing). _This glass is obviously made from a substance like those implemented in the Mirror of Erised. Which means someone had to give Ron and I these 'special' goblets. Which means someone was trying to set us up._ She began listing the culprits. _Fred? George? No, what would they have to gain? Harry, maybe. But usually he knows enough to stay out of our arguments. Then all that leaves is...Ginny. I should have known! Oh, well. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em. If she wants to play matchmaker, then we can set the boys up. Right._ Suddenly, a wave of drowsiness came over Hermione.

"Well, that's the last time I drink butterbeer before going to bed," she said quietly before stuffing Magic Mirror back in her bag and tossing it and the goblet to the floor. With a yawn, Hermione crawled under the covers. Closing her eyes, she dreamt about flying on a broomstick, an activity which would usually scare the living daylights out of her. But she was riding with Ron, which somehow made it okay.

The rest of the week passed uneventfully, for the most part. Ron kept staring at Hermione throughout their shared classes and mealtimes, but would blush and look away when she discovered his glances. Hermione, on the other hand, was often seen giggling with Ginny and talking in whispers, but the two would cease their planning whenever confronted.

Ron felt uneasy about this, as well as the fact that he was being shunned by his brothers.This abandonment was accompanied by an official (if temporary) ban from the Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes store.

"You're clumsy, Ron," Fred had told him after Ron confronted the twins.

"We have a potentially dangerous new test product, and we can't have you disrupting our progress."

While Ron was pouting as he stirred his scrambled eggs around his plate on that Thursday morning, Harry asked the elder Weasleys what this new ban supposed to accomplish.

"Har-ry," Fred fake-moaned, "you don't want to disrupt our sales or your endeavors, do you?"

"If Ron found out about our little Spoiled Secrets product, we're all in trouble. Ronnie would tell everyone that we were doing unauthorized student testing, and he'd also realize you're trying to set him up with Hermione," George clarified.  
Harry replied, "Do you really think he'd notice?"

Fred shrugged. "But if the plan works, then he and Hermione will be spending much more time with each other. That should keep Hermione out of the store, too. After all, she's the one most likely to pick up on it."

The Boy Who Lived nodded.

"See you later, then," George said as the twins left the table. Hermione and Ginny watched as the two walked out of the Hall, proceeding to whisper faster.

Ron looked concerned about this. His glances at the bookworm had become more obvious over the days. Harry couldn't tell, however, whether Hermione's reaction was positive or negative. To top it off, Ron didn't seem to care about his 'obviousness,' either. Suddenly, he burst and met Harry with a query.

"Do you think Hermione fancies Fred?"

Harry almost burst out in hysterical laughter at this, but restrained himself after taking in the solemn look of horror on the keeper's face. "Of course not, Ron," he replied, trying to think of a logical answer (that is, one that wasn't composed of, "She likes you, peabrain,"). He finally said, "Wouldn't that mean that Ginny likes George? I mean, they're always talking together, as if they agree with each other."

Ron looked even more nauseated after this, but soon composed himself. "Thanks, Harry. I guess you're right," he said before feasting on his scrambled eggs with renewed vigor.

Harry breathed a sigh of relief. The rest of the day proceeded to drag on slowly. The next day, however, was slightly different. Ron continued his occasional stares, but when he was not looking and Hermione was not chatting with Ginny, the bookworm sent anxious glances back his way. Fred and George watched the action between the two "guinea pigs" with interest.

Suddenly, Ron stood up from the table in a determined manner. He walked the short distance over to where Hermione was sitting, wringing his hands slightly. The immediate section of the Gryffindor table quieted down as Ron tapped her on the shoulder. "Uhh..Hermione?"

"Yes, Ron?" she replied, acting rather uptight. But anyone could tell that there was a sparkle in her eyes that had been absent previously.

"Would you like to go out with me?" he asked hurriedly. "I mean I'm banned from the joke shop, but there's loads of other things we could do. Go to the Shrieking Shack, even, er, the bookstore, if-"

Hermione had silenced him by putting a finger to his lips. "If you're asking me to be your girlfriend, then I accept."

Ginny winked at Harry from her spot a few seats down. Tossing him a note scribbled on a scrap of Hermione's Daily Prophet, he read, "Well, that was a bit dramatic."

Harry grinned and turned to the twins, who had suddenly conducted an elaborate high-five of sorts. Their section of table turned to stare at the elder Weasleys.

Fred grinned and announced, "Test product S001 is a success!"

* * *

**Author's Note: **Yahoo! Loople-doo! It's summer and I have free time to finish this! I actually wrote this and the last chapter when I was at the Denver, Colorado airport. I had something of a six-hour layover. It was rather boring. At least I got this out of the way.. well, I hope you're enjoying the end of this story. One chapter to go. Please review! I'm going to have the next chapter up before Half-Blood Prince comes out. Once again; please review! 


	7. Revelations

**Summary:** After five years have passed and Hermione and Ron still haven't realized that they like each other, Harry figures that, with the help of a joke shop and a few drink glasses, he can give them a little push.  
**Rating:** K+  
**Disclaimer:** The Harry Potter characters and previous plot belong to J.K. Rowling. I only own the plot of this fanfiction.

* * *

**Love Plus Four  
Chapter Seven : Revelations**

Hermione and Ron were now a couple, and everyone knew about it. Although their relationship recieved a few negative responses, most of the Hogwarts public was relieved that the two had stopped their incessant bickering.

"It only took three days," Ginny told Harry on Saturday morning.

"Mhmm," replied Harry absentmindedly. He was still thinking about when he could practice for the upcoming Quidditch season. Another thought was creeping into his head: what had Ginny and Hermione been whispering about, anyway?

"Of course," the female Weasley replied, "we're not done yet."

This caught Harry's attention. He figured some further matchmaking would be involved. "Hey," he asked, "where are Fred and George?"

Ginny grinned devilishly. (Of course, Hermione and Ron were out on their 'sacred' first date.) "Hermione and I decided that there was some further setting-up of friends to be done. So we filled out a 'love help' card from Angelina and Alicia's Love Shack shop. The card system is basically a dating dervice. And since Angelina and Alicia fancy the twins, we knew that they would snatch the opportunity to set themselves up with Fred and George."

Harry gazed at Ginny, slack jawed. "They fancy the twins?"

"Wasn't it obvious? With the four of them and Hermione and Ron, it's love - plus four!" she replied huffily.

Harry just shook his head slowly. Suddenly, the two remaining members of the trio burst into the Gryffindor common room.

"I never know how great flying could be!" Hermione raved.

Ginny and Harry looked to Ron for an explanation. Said redhead just shrugged.

"She was begging me to let her fly, so I took her out on my broomstick." He looked just as bewildered as the other two, proceeding to settle into the couch with Hermione. Without proper warning or reason, the four fell into some sort of Saturday stupor. Hermione fell asleep on Ron's shoulder, while Ron just sat thinking (presumably worrying about his upcoming year as a keeper). Harry continued working on that dreaded Potions essay, and Ginny was writing a letter. Everybody snapped out of this little phase (Hermione waking up and saying sleepily, "But I want to join the Quidditch team!") when Fred and George entered the room.

"Wonderful time that was," George said.

"We had a great time on our little blind date," Fred added. The two shot suspicious looks at Hermione and Ginny, who proceeded to excuse themselves promptly.

"Dinnertime!" Ginny yelled, before speeding out of the portrait hole with Hermione in tow.

Harry looked at the clock. "It really is time to eat," he told the three remaining Weasleys.

The twins grinned as the four boys headed down to the Great Hall. Everyone seemed to be in an especially good mood, despite the twins being suspiciously over-observant. Suddenly, the meal was disrupted when Dumbledore stood on top of the staff table.

Their headmaster proceeded to tap dance, stepping to a seemingly complicated routine. Each hogwarts student gazed intently until, with a final_click_, the professor took his seat. Everyone proceeded to clap, quite astonished by their 'insane' headmaster. Fred and George were especially happy, until-

"Would the seventh-year Weasley boys see me in my office after supper," Dumbledore's voice boomed across the hall before he continued feasting.

"Darn," Fred cursed.

"Product S001 was doing so well, too," George said, winking at Harry.

The meal ended late and the students dispersed and went to bed. Before Harry fell asleep, one thought ran through his head:

_If the thing with beating Voldemort falls through, I can always get a job as a matchmaker._

**FIN**

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**Author's Note: **Wow.. it's all done! And it only took me, what? A year? That's what it looks like. Ah, well. I had fun writing this story. And now I can free myself to write for my Tales of Symphonia fic! I am free! I can start a new Harry Potter story! Yahoo! ... yeah, heheh. It was fun. Thanks for reading, and please review! 


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